Warning: File may contain material that is inappropriate for some readers (particularly younger ones) -- caution and discretion is advised!

A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K | L | M | N | O | P | Q | R | S | T | U | V | W | X | Y | Z

$0.02           Throwing in your two cents' worth
1FTR            One for the road
24/7		24 hours a day, 7 days a week

A
A/S		Age/Sex?
A/S/L		Age/Sex/Location (or Language)?
AA              Alcoholics Anonymous
AAA             Travel club
AAAAA           Travel club for alcoholics 
		American Association Against Acronym Abuse
AAMOF           As A Matter Of Fact
ABC		Already Been Chewed
ABD		All But Dissertation
ACRONYM         Abbreviated Coded Rendition Of Name Yielding Meaning
ADN             Any Day Now
AFAIAA		As Far As I Am Aware
AFAIC		As Far As I'm Concerned
AFAICS		As Far As I Can See
AFAIK           As Far As I Know
AFAIR		As Far As I Remember; As Far As I Recall
AFAIUI		As Far As I Understand It
AFK             Away From Keyboard
AFZ		Acronym Free Zone
AIR		As I Remember; As I Recall
AISB		As I Said Before
AISI            As I See It
AIW		As It Were/Was
AKA             Also Known As
AMAP		As Much/Many As Possible
AMF		Adios Mother F---er; Adios My Friend
ANFAWFOS        And Now For A Word From Our Sponsor
APAC		All Praise And Credit
APYR		As Per Your Request
ASAFP           As Soon As F---ing Possible
ASAP            As Soon As Possible
ASCII		American Standard Code of Information Interchange
ATB		All The Best
ATEOTLYWBAT	At The End Of This Lesson You Will Be Able To
ATLA            Another Three Letter Acronym
ATM		At The Moment / Automatic Teller Machine
ATTN            Attention
ATTYOB		Anything That Turns You On Baby
AWCIGO		And Where Can I Get One
AWGTHTGTATA     Are We Going To Have To Go Through ALL This Again?
AWGTHTGTTA      Are We Going To Have To Go Through This Again?
AWHFY           Are We Having Fun Yet?
AYT		Are You There?

B
B/C             BeCause (frequently just "b/c")
B3		Blah, Blah, Blah
B4              Before
B4N             Bye for Now
BAC             By Any Chance
BAD             Broken As Designed
BAMF            Bad Assed Mother F---er
BANANA		Built Absolutely Nothing Anywhere Near Anybody
BB		Be Back
BBFN            Bye Bye For Now
BBIAB		Be Back In A Bit
BBL             Be Back Later
BBR             Burnt Beyond Repair
BBS             Bulletin Board System; Be Back Soon
BBW		Big Beautiful Woman
BC              Basket Case
BCC		Blind Carbon Copy
BCNU            Be seein' you! (saying goodbye)
BEG		Big Evil Grin
BF              Boyfriend
BFD             Big F---ing Deal
BFG             Big Friendly Giant; Big F---ing Gun; Big F---ing Grin
BFH		Big F---ing Hammer
BFI             Brute Force and Ignorance; Bunch of F---ing Idiots
BFM		Big F---ing Magic
BFMI		Brute Force and Massive Ignorance
BFN             Bye For Now
BFOG		Blouse Full Of Goodies
BG		Big Grin (as in <bg>)
BIC		Best In Class
BICBW		But I Could Be Wrong
BIL		Brother In Law
BION            Believe It Or Not
BIOYIOP         Blow It Out Your I/O Port
BISS		Because I Say So
BITD		Beaten It To Death
BK              Because
BKA		Better Known As
BKAM		Between Keyboard And Monitor (i.e., problem is with the user)
BMF		Bad Mother F---er
BMOC		Big Man On Campus
BMTIPG          Brilliant Minds Think In Parallel Gutters
BNF             Big Name Fan
BOC             But Of Course
BOF		Birds Of a Feather
BOFH		Bastard [system] Operator From Hell
BOGOF		Buy One Get One Free
BOHICA          Bend Over, Here It Comes Again!
BOL		Best Of Luck
BOS             Big Orange Switch
BOT             Back On Topic
BOTE		Back Of The Envelope
BOTEC           Back Of The Envelope Calculation
BRB             Be Right Back
BRS             Big Red Switch
BS              Bull S---
BSEG            Big S--- Eating Grin
BSG		Broad Sweeping Generalization; Big Smiling Grin
BSOD		Blue Screen Of Death
BTA             But Then Again (in response to IOW)
BTAICBW         But Then Again I could Be Wrong
BTAIM           Be That As It May
BTDT            Been There, Done That
BTDTGTTS	Been There, Done That, Got The T-Shirt
BTLSOM		Beats The Living S--- Out of Me
BTOBD           Be There Or Be Dead
BTSOOM          Beats The S--- Out Of Me
BTW             By The Way
BUAF		Butt Ugly ASCII Font
BUAG		Butt Ugly ASCII Graphic
BWQ             Buzz Word Quotient
BY		BusY
BYKT            But You Knew That
BYKTA           But You Knew That Already
BYOB		Bring Your Own Booze/Bottle

C
C/O             in Care Of (for sending mail)
C/P/S		City or Country / Profession / Status (married/single)
CADET           Can't Add, Doesn't Even Try
CB              Call Back
CC		Carbon Copy; Courtesy Copy
CE              Creative Editing
CF              Charlie Foxtrot; Cluster F--- (meaning similar to SNAFU)
CFD		Call For Discussion
CHOWUR		see (C) HOW yoU aRe
CHUR		see (C) How yoU aRe
CI$             Compu$erve Information Service (tm)
CIC		Christ, I'm Confused
CIS             Compuserve Information System (tm)
CIAO            as in goodbye (said 'Chow')
CIO		Cut It Out
CLAB		Crying Like A Baby
CLOAKA		Canonical List Of All Known Acronyms
CMIIW           Correct Me If I'm Wrong
CO              COnference
COB		Close Of Business
COD             Cash On Delivery (when receiving mail)
COTFLGOHAHA     Crawling On The Floor Laughing Guts Out And Having A
			Heart Attack
CPF             Can Pigs Fly?
CRAFT		Can't Remember A F---ing Thing
CRPG            Character (or computer) Role Playing Game
CRS		Can't Remember S---
CS              Cop Shop (police station)
CTTD		Cute Things They Do
CTTS		Cute Things They Say
CU              see (C) yoU
CUL             see (C) yoU LateR
CUL8R           see (C) yoU LateR (L8R)
CUL8TR          see (C) yoU LaTeR (L8TR)
CWYL            Chat With You Later
CYA             Cover Your Ass; see (C) YA
CYL             see (C) You Later

D
D&C             "Duck and Cover" - a popular 1950's song in dedication
			to the atomic bomb (and its' possible attack)
D/L             Download, transmit to you
DAF		Divorced Asian Female
DAM		Divorced Asian Male
DAP             Parents Against Dyslexia
DBA             Doing Business As
DBF		Divorced Black Female
DBM		Divorced Black Male
DBN             Doing Business, NOT
DD		Darling Daughter
DEU		Dumb End User
DFU		Don't Forget Units
DH		Dear Hubby; Dumb Hubby; Deaf Hubby; DickHead
DIIK            Damned If I Know
DIIN            Damned If I kNow
DIL		Daughter In Law
DILLIGAF        Does It Look Like I Give A F---?
DILLIGAFF       Do I Look Like I Give a Flying F---?
DINK		Double Income, No Kids
DITUIHIBMSL?    Did I tell you I hate IBMs lately?
DITUILIBMSL?    Did I tell you I love IBMs lately?
DJF		Divorced Jewish Female
DJM		Divorced Jewish Male
DK              Don't Know
DKU		Drop Kick Ugly
DL              Download, transmit to you
DLG             Devilish Little Grin
DNA		Did Not Answer
DNPM            Darn Near P---ed Myself
DOA             Dead On Arrival
DOB		Date/Day Of Birth
DOM             Dirty Old Man
DRA		Don't Recognize Acronyms
DS		Darling Son
DTA		Don't Trust Anybody
DTD		Document Type Definition
DTOKAB		Drop To One Knee And Blow
DTP             DeskTop Publishing
DTRT            Do The Right Thing
DUCWIC          Do You see (C) What I see (C)
DUK		Dead Upon Keyboard
DWF		Divorced White Female
DWIM		Do What I Mean
DWIMC           Do What I Mean, Correctly
DWIMNWIS        Do What I Mean, Not What I Say
DWKOTA		Deep Wet Kiss On The Ass
DWKOTL		Deep Wet Kiss On The Lips
DWM		Divorced White Male
DYE		Damn Your Eyes!
DYHWIH          Do You Hear What I Hear
DYSWIS          Do You See What I See

E
E2EG            Ear to Ear Grin
ED              Emotionally Disturbed
EDP             Emotionally Disturbed Person
EG		Evil Grin; (for example, usually e.g.)
EGC		Extrememly Gruntled Customer
EIF		Exercise In Futility
EMS		E-Mail Shorthand
EOB		End Of Business
EOD             End Of Discussion
EOF		End Of File
EOL             End Of Lecture
EOT             End Of Thread (i.e., don't reply to this message)
ES&D            Eat S--- & Die
ES&LTHI		Eat Shit & Live To Hate It
ESAD            Eat S--- And Die
ESAL            Eat S--- And Live
ESBAM		Eat S---, Bark At Moon
ESP             ESPecially (frequently just "esp.")
ESOSL           Endless Snorts of Stupid Laughter
ETA		Estimated Time of Arrival
ETD		Estimated Time of Departure
ETE		Estimated Time En route
ETLA            Extended Three Letter Acronym

F
F2F		Face To Face
FA		F--- All (nothing)
FAQ             Frequently Asked Question
FCFS            First Come, First Served
FCOL            For Crying Out Loud
FDROTFL         Falling Down Rolling On The Floor Laughing
FFRD            Flying F--- in a Rolling Donut (I don't give a....)
FFS		For F---s Sake
FHFHFH		F--- Him, Feed Him FishHeads
FICCL		Frankly, I Couldn't Care Less
FIGJAM		F--- I'm Good, Just Ask Me
FIGMO           F--- It, Got My Orders
FIIK            F---ed If I Know!
FIIN            F---ed If I kNow!
FIL		Father In Law
FIOFYF		Figure It Out For Yourself, F---er
FISH            First In, Still Here
FISHDO		F--- It, S--- Happens, Drive On
FITB            Fill In The Blank
FKMFATIFKYB	French Kiss My Furry Ass 'Til It French Kisses You Back!
FLK		Funny Looking Kid
FMH             F--- Me Harder (usually an exclamation of disgust)
FMTEYEWTK	Far More Than Everything You've Ever Wanted To Know
FNI		F---ing Not Involved
FotR		Fellowship of the Rings (a Tolkien work)
FOAD            F--- Off And Die
FOAF            Friend Of A Friend
FOAFOAG         Father Of A Friend Of A Girlfriend
FOAG            Father Of A Girlfriend
FOCLMAO		Fell Off Chair Laughin My Ass Off
FOD		Finger Of Death
FOOBAR          Variant of FUBAR
FOR		For Obvious Reasons
FOS             Freedom Of Speech; Full Of S---
FOT             Full Of Tripe
FOTCL           Falling Off The Chair Laughing
FRE		Frequently Requested Enhancement
FRED            F---ing Ridiculous Electronic Device
FRZ             Fruitin' Religious Zealot
FTASB           Faster Than A Speeding Bullet
FTDS		F--- The Dumb S---
FTF             Face To Face
FTL             Faster Than Light
FTP             File Transfer Protocol
FTS             Fixin' To Start
FUBAB           F---ed Up Beyond All Belief
FUBAR           F---ed Up Beyond All Repair/Recognition
FUD             Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt
FUMTU           F---ed Up More Than Usual
FURTB           Full Up Ready To Burst (about hard disk drives!)
FWIW            For What It's Worth
FWMAYOR		F--- With Me At Your Own Risk
FY&TSYRIO       F--- You & The Sysop You Rode In On
FYA             For Your Amusement
FYDITM          F--- You Directly In The Mouth
FYI             For Your Information

G
G2G		Got to Go
G               Grin (as in <g>)
GA              Go Ahead
GAC		Get A Clue
GAFIA           Get Away From It All (as in drop out of ILink for a bit)
GAFM		Get Away From Me
GAL		Get A Life
GBH&K		Great Big Hugs & Kisses
GBH&KB		Greak Big Hugs & Kisses Back
GBTM		Get Back To Me
GBY		God Bless You
GC		Garbage Collect (tidy up)
GD&H	    Grinning, Ducking & Hiding
GD&R            Grinning, Ducking & Running
GD&RF           Grinning, Ducking & Running Fast!
GD&RVVF         Grinning, Ducking & Running Very Very Fast!
GD&W            Grinning, Ducking & Weaving
GF              Girlfriend
GFR             Grim File Reaper (pervasive data destroyer)
GFU             General F--- Up
GFY		Go F--- Yourself
GGC             Goo Goo Cluster (cause zits & intestinal blockage)
GGG		GiGGle (as in <ggg>)
GGN             Gotta Go Now
GH              Getting Hard (male)
GIGO            Garbage In, Garbage Out; Garbage In, Gospel Out 
			(people accepting blindly what the computer says)
GIWIST          Gee, I Wish I'd Said That
GKW		God Knows What
GLG             Goofy Little Grin
GLGH            Good Luck and Good Hunting
GM		Got Milk?
GMT		Greenwich Mean Time
GMTA            Great Minds Think Alike
GOK             God Only Knows
GOOML		Get Out Of My Life
GOTFIA          Groaning On The Floor In Agony
GOWI            Get On With It
GPF             General Protection Fault; Go Puke, Fast!
GRUIT           Get Real yoU Impudent Thing
GSHIWMP		Giggling So Hard I Wet My Pants
GTABO		Get That Ass Back On (in response to ROFLMAO)
GTBOS		Glad To Be Of Service
GTFOOMF         Get The F--- Out Of My Face
GTG		Got To Go; Good To Go
GTP		Gone To Pee
GW              Getting Wet (female)
GWATCDR		God Willing And The Creek Don't Rise

H
H2              How To
HAND            Have A Nice Day
HAK		Hugs And Kisses
HCB             Holy Cow, Batman!
HHGTTG          HitchHiker's Guide To The Galaxy
HHO 1/2 K       Ha Ha Only Half Kidding
HHOJ            Ha Ha Only Joking
HHOK            Ha Ha Only Kidding
HHOS            Ha Ha Only Serious
HIB_		Have I Been ______?
HIRTA		HereInafter Referred To As
HLV		Hasta La Vista
HLVB		Hasta La Vista, Baby
HMFIC		Head Mother F---er In Charge
HMFWRIC		Head Mother F---er What aRe In Charge
HOMPR           Hang On, Mobile Phones' Ringing
HP		Home Page
HSIK            How Should I Know
HSP		Highly Sensitive Person
HTB		Heavens To Betsy
HTFSIK          How The F--- Should I Know
HTH             Hope This Helps!
HTML		Hyper Text Markup Language
HUA             Head Up Ass
HUF		Horny Unattached Female
HUM		Horny Unattached Male
HW		HardWare
HWUA            Head Way Up Ass
HWS(PEST)       Husband Wants Sex (Please Excuse Slow Typing)

I
IAAA            I Am An Accountant
IAAL            I Am A Lawyer
IAC             In Any Case
IAE             In Any Event
IANAA           I Am Not An Accountant
IANAC           I Am Not A Crook
IANAL           I Am Not A Lawyer
IANALBIPOOTV    I Am Not A Lawyer, But I Play One On TV
IANYM		In A New York Minute
IARTPFWTSIOWIM  I Am Repeating This Parrot-Fashion Without The
			Slightest Idea Of What It Means.
IASH		I Am So Horny
IAWTP		I Agree With This Post
IBB		I'll Be Back
IBC             Inadequate, But Cute
IBM             Inadequate, But Marketable
IC              I see (C)
ICB		I Care Because?
ICBM            InterContinental Ballistic Missile
ICIHICPCL	I Can't Imagine How I Could Possibly Care Less
ICTYBTIHTKY	I Could Tell You But Then I'd Have To Kill You
ICUR            I see (C) You Are
IDD		InDeeD
IDGAD           I Don't Give A Damn
IDGAS           I Don't Give A S---
IDGI		I Don't Get It
IDK		I Don't Know
IDTS		I Don't Think So
IDTT            I'll Drink To That!
IE		that is (normally i.e.)
IHATCFYB        I Have A Terrible Craving For Your Body!
IHNJ,IJLS	I Have No Joke, I Just Like Saying (often together like this)
IHTBS		It Has To Be Shown
IHTFP           I Hate This F---ing Place; I Have Truly Found Paradise
IIABDFI         If It Ain't Broke, Don't Fix It
IINM		If I'm Not Mistaken
IIRC            If I Recall/Remember Correctly
IITYWIMIWHTKY   If I Tell You What It Means, I Will Have To Kill You
IITYWIMWYBMAD   If I Tell You What It Means, Will You Buy Me A Drink?
IITYWTMWYKM     If I Tell You What This Means Will You Kiss Me?
IITYWYBAD       If I Tell You, Will You Buy Another Drink?
IITYWYBMAB      If I Tell You, Will You Buy Me A Beer?
IJLS		I Just Like Saying
IK		I Know
IKYABWAI	I Know You Are, But What Am I?
ILI             I Like Ike
ILICISCOMK	I Laughed, I Cried, I Spat Coffee/Coke/Cadmium On My Keyboard
ILIWTPCT        I Love It When The Plan Comes Together.
ILN		It's Looking Nice / It Looks Nice
ILS		Imaginary Lat Syndrome
ILSHIBAMF       I Laughed So Hard I Broke All My Furniture!
ILU             I Love yoU
ILY             I Love You
IMAO            In My Arrogant Opinion
IMBO            In My Biased Opinion
IMCDO           In My Conceited Dogmatic Opinion
IMCO            In My Considered Opinion
IME             In My Experience
IMHO            In My Humble Opinion
IMMOR		I Make My Own Rules
IMMSMC		If My Memory Serves Me Correctly
IMNSHO          In My Not So Humble Opinion
IMNSVHO		In My Not So Very Humble Opinion
IMO             In My Opinion
IMOBO           In My Own Biased Opinion
IMPOV           In My Point Of View
IMS		I Must Say
IMU		I Miss yoU
IMVHO           In My Very Humble Opinion
INGSI		I'm Not Gonna Say It
INPO            In No Particular Order
INT		I'll Never Tell
IOU             I Owe yoU
IOW             In Other Words
IRL		In Real Life
IROOC           I've Run Out Of Cigarettes
ISAGN		I See A Great Need
ISO		In Search Of; International Organization for Standardization;
			Organisation Internationale de Normalisation
ISP		Internet Service Provider
ISTM		It Seems To Me
ISTR            I Seem To Remember
ITAH		Is There Anybody Here
ITFA            In The Final Analysis
IUTHALORFH	I Used To Have A Lot Of Respect For Him/Her
ITYM		I Think You Mean
IUTKATS		I Used To Know All That Stuff
IWBNI           It Would Be Nice If
IWIK            I Wish I Knew
IWSN		I Want Sex Now
IYFEG           Insert Your Favorite Ethnic Group
IYKWIM		If You Know What I Mean
IYKWIMAITYD	If You Know What I Mean And I Think You Do
IYSWIM		If You See What I Mean
IYW		If You Wish

J
J/K		Just Kidding
JAFO		Just Another F---ing Observer
JAFU		Just Another F--- Up
JAM             Just A Moment; Just A Minute
JANFU           Joint Army-Navy F--- Up.  (When American troops get
			shelled by their own side, in this case involving
			both the army and the navy.)
JAS             Just A Second
JAWS            Just Another Windows Shell
JFF		Just For Fun
JFYI		Just For Your Information
JIC             Just In Case
JMOOC		Just My Opinion Of Course
JMHFOOC		Just My Humble F---ing Opinion Of Course
JPW		Just Plain Weird
JSNM            Just Stark Naked Magic
JTYWTK          Just Thought You Wanted To Know

K
K		oKay
KCBIWIYWI       Keep Coming Back, It Works If You Work It
KDW		Keep Digging, Watson (reply to NSS)
KEAH		Kill Everyone After Hours
KIBO		Knowledge In, Bulls--- Out
KISS            Keep It Simple Stupid
KITA            Kick In The Ass  (type of therapy)
KMA             Kiss My Ass
KMYF            Kiss Me You Fool
KOTC		Kiss On The Cheek
KOTL		Kiss On The Lips
KTCOOTN		Keep This Crap Out Of This Newsgroup
KUTGW		Keep Up The Good Work
KWIM		Know What I Mean?
KYHOOYA		Keep Your Head Out Of Your Ass

L
L8R             Later
LAB&TYD         Life's A Bitch & Then You Die
LAGNAF          Let's All Get Naked And F---
LART            Luser Attitude Re-adjustment Tool [Clue by four]
LIFER		Lazy Incompetent F---er Evading Responsibility
LJBF		Let's Just Be Friends
LLTA            Lots and Lots of Thunderous/Thundering Applause
LMA		Leave Me Alone
LMAO            Laughing My Ass Off
LMAOROTF	Laughing My Ass Off Rolling On The Floor
LMC		Lost My Connection
LMCOA		Lost My Connection Once Again
LMFAO           Laughing My F---ing Ass Off
LMK		Let Me Know
LMTFA           Leave Me The F--- Alone
LMWIS           Lick Me Where I Sweat
LotR		Lord of the Rings (a Tolkien work)
LOA		List Of Acronyms/Abbreviations
LOHICA		Look Out, Here It Comes Again (military term)
LOI		Lack Of Interest
LOL             Laughing Out Loud; Little Old Lady; Lots Of Luck
LOLAROTG	Laughing Out Loud And Rolling On The Ground
LOMBARD         Lots Of Money But A Real Dickhead
LSFIAB		Like Shooting Fish In A Barrel
LSHIPMP		Laughing So Hard I Peed My Pants
LSP		Less Sensitive Person
LTBF		Learn To Be Funny
LTIP            Laughing Til I Puke
LTMSH           Laughing 'Til My sides Hurt
LTNS		Long Time, No See
LTUAE		Life, The Universe, And Everything (3rd part of THHGTTG)
LULU		Locally Unwanted Land Use
LUSER		Loser USER
LZ		Loser!

M
M$		Micro$oft
MARINE		My Ass Riding In Navy Equipment;
			Muscles Are Required, Intelligence Not Essential
MAY		Mad About You
MAYB		Mad About You, Baby
MBUC		Mind Bogglingly Unlikely Coincidence
MCIBTY(SN)      My Computer Is Better Than Yours (So Nyerrr)
MD              More Dirt (Physician)
MEGO		My Eyes Glaze Over
MFG             More Friendly Garbage!
MFIC		Mother F---er In Charge
MFWIC		Mother F---er What's In Charge
MGD             My Gameboy Died
MH		Mostly Harmless (5th part of THHGTTG)
MHDC(A)         My Hard Drive crashed (again)
MIL		Mother In Law
MILF		Mother I'd Like to F---
MILG		Make It Look Good
MIPS		Meaningless Information Per Second
ML		More Later
MLA             Multiple Letter Acronym
MMIF            My Mouth Is Full
MOF             Matter Of Fact
MOR		Middle Of the Road
MORF            Male Or Female
MOS             Member of the Opposite Sex
MOTAS           Member Of The Appropriate Sex
MOTD		Message Of The Day
MOTH            Humorous Collectibles Forum variation on Member of the Month
MOTM            Member Of The Month
MOTOS           Member Of The Opposite Sex
MOTSS           Member Of The Same Sex
MS              More S---; More of the Same; (Masters Degree)
MSCEA           My Southern Comforts' Empty Again
MSS             Member of the Same Sex
MTFBWY		May The Force Be With You
MUD             Multi User Domain (or Dungeon)
MUF		Material Unaccounted For
MUNG            Mash/Mung Until No Good
MYOB            Mind Your Own Business

N
NAGI		Not A Good Idea
NAHM		Not A Happy Man
NAHW		Not A Happy Woman
NAVY            Never Again Volunteer Yourself
NB		Nota Bene (note well)
NBD             No Big Deal
NBL             Not Bloody Likely
NBTD		Nothing Better To Do
NERD            National Establishment for Real Dorks
NFG             No F---ing Good
NFI             No F---ing Idea
NFIAA		No F---ing Idea At All
NFW             No F---ing Way
NFY		No F--- You
NG		News Group
NHOH		Never Heard Of Him/Her
NIAA		No Idea At All
NICBDAT         Nothing Is Certain But Death And Taxes
NIDWTC		No I Don't Want To Chat
NIH		Not Invented Here
NIMBY           Not In My Back Yard
NIMFYE		Not In My Front Yard Either
NINO            Nothing In, Nothing Out
NIMTO           Not In My Term of Office
NIT		Not In Therapy
NLI		Not Logged In
NM		NeverMind
NMFJ		Not My F---ing Job
NMI		No Middle Initial
NN		Night-Night
NOPE		Not On Planet Earth
NORWICH		kNickers Off Ready When I Come Home
NOYB            None Of Your Business
NP		No Problem
NPF		No Problem Found
NPLU            Not People Like Us
NQA             No Questions Asked
NQOS            Not Quite Our Sort
NRN             No Reply Necessary
NSS             No S---, Shylock/Sherlock
NTG             Not Too Good
NTH             No Therapy Helpful
NTIBOA		Not That I'm Bitter Or Anything
NTIM            Not That It Matters
NTIMM           Not That It Matters Much
NTL             NeverTheLess / NoneTheLess
NUI             Network User Identification
NWCDP		Nothing We Could Do Partner
NYM		New York Minute
NYP		Not Your Problem

O
O		Over (to you)
OATUS           On A Totally Unrelated Subject
OAUS            On An Unrelated Subject
OB              Obligatory (frequently Ob)
OBTW            Oh, By the Way
OD              OverDose; Oh Dear
OFO		Out F---ing Off
OFS		One Finger Salute
OIC             Oh, I see (C)
OMFG		Oh My F---ing God!
OMG		Oh My God!
ONNA            Oh No, Not Again
ONNTA           Oh No, Not This Again
OO		Over and Out
OOSOOM          Out Of Sight, Out Of Mind
OOTB		Out Of The Box
OOTC            Obligatory On Topic Comment
OPL		Obvious Panty Line
OPM		Other People's Money
OPP		Other People's Problems
OSIF		Oh S---, I Forgot!
OSIM		Oh Shoot It's Monday
OSU		Officially Sanctioned User
OT		Off Topic
OT1H		On The One Hand
OTBE		Over Taken By Events (orig. military)
OTC             Over The Counter
OTD		Out The Door
OTF             On The Floor
OTK		Over The Knee
OTL             Out To Lunch
OTOH            On The Other Hand; On The One Hand
OTOOH           On The Other Other Hand
OTT		Over The Top
OTTH            On The Third Hand
OTTOMH          Off The Top Of My Head
OTTOMHAROO      Off the Top of My Head and Rolling Out of Bounds
OTW             On The Whole
OW		Oh Well
OWTTE           Or Words To That Effect

P
PABG            Pack A Big Gun
PBD		Programmer Brain Damage
PBM             Play By Mail (games)
PCB             Please Call Back
PCMCIA		People Can't Master/Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms;
			Personal Computer Memory Card International Association
PCO		Please Carry On 
PCYLIHOONL      Please Cross Your Legs, I Have Only One Nail Left
PD              Public Domain
PDA		Public Display of Affection
PDN             Public Data Network
PDQ             Pretty Damn Quick
PEBCAK		Problem Exists Between Chair And Keyboard
PF&HOMW         Printed, Framed & Hanging On My Wall
PFM		Pure F---ing Magic
PFY		Pimply Faced Youth
PGY             Post Graduate Year (as in PGY-1, PGY-2 etc. used in PGY Med)
PHB		Pointy Haired Boss (from Dilbert, i.e., doesn't have a clue)
PhD             Piled Higher and Deeper.
PHD		Push Here Dummy (type of automatic camera)
PICNIC		Problem In Chair, Not In Computer
PIMP            Pee In My Pants (often in combination)
PITA            Pain In The Ass
PITBY		Put It in Their Back Yard
PKB		Pot, Kettle, Black!
PLBKAC		Problem Lies Between Keyboard And Chair
PLMKO		Please Let Me Know, Ok?
PLOKTA          Press Lots Of Keys To Abort
PLONK		Please Leave Our Newsgroup, Killfiled!
PMBI            Pardon My Butting In
PMETC           Pardon Me ETC.
PMFBI           Pardon Me For Butting In
PMFJI		Pardon Me For Jumping In
PMFJIH          Pardon Me For Jumping In Here.
PMJI            Pardon My Jumping In
PMYMHMMFSWGAD   Pardon Me, You Must Have Mistaken Me For Someone 
			Who Gives A Damn
PMYMHMMFSWGAS   Pardon Me, You Must Have Mistaken Me For Someone Who
			Gives A S---.
POC		Prisoner Of Chat; Peeping Other Chatters
POETS		Piss On Everything, Tomorrow's Saturday; Piss Off Early,
			Tomorrow's Saturday
POITS		Piss On It Tomorrow's Saturday
POM		Phase Of the Moon
POME		Prisoner Of Mother England
POP		Point Of Presence; Post Office Protocol
POS		Piece Of S---; Person Over Shoulder
POSSLQ          Person of Opposite Sex Sharing Living Quarters
POQ             Piss Off Quickly
POQADCB         Piss Off Quickly and Don't Come Back!
POV             Point Of View
PPL		PeoPLe
PPN             Programmer Project Number (currently known as UserID)
PPOSTFU		Post Proof Or Shut The F--- Up
PPP             Petty Pet Peeve; Point to Point Protocol
PPPP            Previous Paragraph was Polemical Position
PS              Post Scriptum; PostScript
PT              Physical Training
PTB             Powers That Be
PTM		Please Tell Me
PTO             Patent and Trademark Office (US Govt); Please Turn Over
PUNTS		People of Utterly No Tactical Significance (military term)
PW		Pathetic Wanker; PowWow
PYS		Pack Your Stuff

Q
QED             Quod Erat Demonstrandum; Quite Easily Done
QT		QuieT (also q.t., Q&T, or as a phrase "on the q.t.")

R
RA		Research Assistant; Resident Assistant
RAK		Random Act of Kindness
RBS		Really Big Screen
RE              REgarding
REMF		Rear Echelon Mother F---ers (eg, clueless micromanaging bosses)
RFC		Request For Comments
RFD             Request For Discussion
RFT             Request For Thinking
RHIP            Rank Has Its Privileges
RL		Real Life
RLCO            Real Life COnference
RNA             Ring, No Answer
ROFFNAR         Rolling On the Floor For No Apparent Reason
ROFL            Rolling On the Floor Laughing
ROFLAHMSL       Rolling On the Floor Laughing And Holding My Sides Laughing
ROFLASC         Rolling On the Floor Laughing And Scaring the Cat
ROFLASTC        Rolling On the Floor Laughing And Scaring The Cat
ROFLGO          Rolling On Floor Laughing Guts Out!
ROFLMAO         Rolling On the Floor Laughing My ASCII Off
ROFLMAOOL	Rolling On the Floor Lauging My Ass Off Out Loud
ROFLOL          Rolling On the Floor Laughing Out Loud
ROFLOLVH        Rolling On the Floor Laughing Out Loud Very Hard
ROFLWMK		Rolling On the Floor Laughing -- Wet My Knickers
ROFPML          Roll On Floor Pissing Myself Laughing.
ROFTTPOF        Rolling On the Floor Trying To Put Out Flames
RotK		Return of the King (a Tolkien work)
ROTBA           Reality On The Blink Again
ROTF            Rolling On The Floor
ROTFL           Rolling On The Floor Laughing
ROTFLAHMS       Rolling On The Floor Laughing And Holding My Side
ROTFLMAAOBPO    Rolling On The Floor Laughing My Ass And Other Body Parts Off
ROTFLMAO	Rolling On The Floor Laughing My Ass Off
ROTFSTCLMAAOBPO Rolling On The Floor Scaring The Cat Laughing My Ass
			And Other Body Parts Off
ROTM            Right On The Money
RPG             Role Playing Games
RSN             Real Soon Now
RSVP		Repondez S'il Vous Plait (French, "please reply")
RT		Real Time
RTFI            Read The F---ing Instructions
RTFM            Read The F---ing Manual
RTFQ		Read The F---ing Question
RTFS		Read The F---ing Source
RTFMS           Read The F---ing Manual, Sir  (from the military)
RTI		Real Time Interruption
RTS		Read The Screen
RUMF		aRe yoU Male or Female?

S
S/O		SomeOne (frequently just "s/o")
S/TH		SomeTHing (frequently just "s/th")
S2BX		Soon To Be eX
SAF		Single Asian Female
SAM		Single Asian Male
SAMF		Sad Ass Mother F---er
SAMFU           Self-Adjusting Military F--- Up
SAMFUTU		Situation Abnormal, More F---ed Up Than Usual
SAPFU           Surpassing All Previous F--- Ups
SAR		Smart Ass Remark
SAYOR		Speak At Your Own Risk
SBB		Stupid Beyond Belief
SBCN            Sitting Behind the Computer, Naked
SBD		Silent But Deadly
SBF		Single Black Female
SBID		S---ty But It'll Do
SBM		Single Black Male
SCNR		Sorry, Could Not Resist
SDIHTT		SomeDay I'll Have The Time
SEC             SECond, eg. Wait a sec
SEG             S--- Eating Grin
SEP             Somebody Else's Problem
SFLA            Stupid Four Letter Acronym
SFT		Sorry For That
SGML		Standardized General Markup Language
SH              S--- Happens
SHLH		Sitting Here Lauging Hysterically
SHTS		Spit Hitting The Spam
SHTSI		Somebody Had To Say It
SICS            Sitting In Chair Snickering
SIG             Special Interest Group
SIIN            Stuffed If I Know!
SIL		Son In Law; Sister In Law
SITD            Still In The Dark
SJF		Single Jewish Female
SJM		Single Jewish Male
SLATFATF	So Long, And Thanks For All The Fish (4th part of THHGTTG)
SLIP		Single Line In Protocol; Serial Line Internet Protocol
SLJ		S---ty Little Job
SLJO		S---ty Little Job Officer
SMAR		Suck My Ass Raw
SMDP		System Monitoring Display Protocol
SMMWO		Shut My Mouth Wide Open
SMO             Serious Mode On
SMOF		Secret Master(s) Of Fandom
SMOP            Small Matter Of Programming
SMOFF           Serious Mode OFF
SMTP		Simple Mail Transfer Protocol
SNAC		Sitting Naked At Computer
SNAFU           Situation Normal: All F---ed Up
SNAG		Sensitive New Age Guy
SNERT		Snot-Nosed Egotistical Rude Teenager
SNFIAA		Still No F---ing Idea At All
SNR		Signal to Noise Ratio
SO              Significant Other
SOI             Stink On Ice
SOL             S--- Out of Luck
SOP             Standing Operational Procedures; Standard Operating Procedure
SOS             Same Old S---
SOSO		Same Old, Same-Old
SOVS		SomeOne Very Special
SPAM            SPiced hAM (Hormel's canned meat)
SSDD            Same S---, Different Day
SSIA		Subject Says It All
ST              Star Trek; Such That (frequently just "s.t.")
ST-DS9          Star Trek, Deep Space 9
ST-TNG          Star Trek, The Next Generation
ST-TOS          Star Trek, The Original Series
ST-VOY          Star Trek, Voyager
STBY		Sucks To Be You
STFU            Shut The F--- Up
STFW		Search The Fine/F---ing Web
STIFF           "Stiff", said loudly.
STI / ST-TMP    Star Trek, first movie / The Motion Picture
STII / ST-WOK   Star Trek, second movie / 'Wrath Of Khan'
STIII / ST-SFS  Star Trek, third movie / 'Search For Spock'
STIV / ST-TVH   Star Trek, fourth movie / 'The Voyage Home'
STS		So To Speak
STV / ST-TFF    Star Trek, fifth movie / 'The Final Frontier'
STVI / ST-TUC   Star Trek, sixth movie / 'The Undiscovered Country'
SUCDIC		Situation Under Control, Dickheads In Charge
SUFID           Screwing Up Face In Disgust
SUNOILTY	Shut Up, No One Is Listening To You
SUSFU           Situation Unchanged, Still F---ed Up
SUYP		Shut Up You Pervert
SW		SoftWare; So What?; Says Whom?; StarWars
SW-SE		StarWars Special Edition
SWAG            Simple Wild Ass Guess; Scientific Wild Ass Guess
SWAK            Sealed With A Kiss
SWALK           Sealed With A Loving Kiss
SWCOC		Special Wishes, Comments, Or Corrections
SWDYRTW		Since When Do You Rule The Web?
SWF		Single White Female
SWM		Single White Male
SWMBO           She Who Must Be Obeyed
SWYP 		So What's Your Problem?
SYSOP           SYStem OPerator
SYT             Sweet Young Thing

T
TA		Teaching Assistant
TAF             That's All, Folks!
TAFN            That's All For Now
TANJ            There Ain't No Justice
TANSTAAFL       There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch
TARFU           Things Are Really F---ed Up
TBC		To Be Continued
TBE             To Be Expected
TBH		To Be Honest
TBYB            Try Before You Buy
TC              Telephone Call; Take Care
TCB             Taking Care of Business
TCBY            Taking Care of Business, Ya'll
TCD             The Cat's Dead
TDD             The Dog's Dead
TDM             Too Damn Many
TEOTWAWKI	The End Of The World As We Know It
TFB		Too F---ing Bad
TFE             Too F---ing Easy
TFM		The F---ing Manual
TFS             Three Finger Salute (Ctrl-Alt-Del)
TFTT            Thanks For The Thought
TFW		Totally F---ing Worthless
TGAL            Think Globally, Act Locally
TGIF            Thank God Its Friday
TGTF		Thank God Tomorrow's Friday
THHGTTG		The HitchHiker's Guide To The Galaxy
THO		Titty Hard On
TIA             Thanks In Advance
TIATLG          Truly, I Am The Living God
TIC             Tongue In Cheek
TIE		Take It Easy
TIME            Tears In My Eyes (often in combination)
TIMTOWTDI	There Is More Than One Way To Do It
TINALO          This Is Not A Legal Opinion
TINAR           This Is Not A Recommendation
TINC		There Is No Cabal
TINSTAAFL	There Is No Such Thing As A Free Lunch
TINWIS          That Is Not What I Said
TIWTGLGG        This Is Where The Goofy Little Grin Goes
TIP             To Insure Promptness
TJATAW          Truth, Justice, And The American Way
TLA             Three Letter Acronym
TLC		Tender Loving Care
TLG             The Living God
TM              Thread Mangler
TMI             Too Much Information
TMIKTLIU	The More I Know, The Less I Understand
TMTC		Too Many To Count
TN              TelNet
TNOTVS          There's Nothing On Television, So ...
TNSO		Temptingly Naked Significant Other
TNX             Thanks (as in ThaNX)
TPAE		The Possibilities Are Endless
TPS(S)          This Program Sucks (Severely)
TPTB            The Powers That Be
TQM		Total Quality Management
TRATEOTU	The Restaurant At The End Of The Universe (2nd part of THHGTTG)
TRDMC           Tears Running Down My Cheeks
TS		Tough S---
TSOHF           Total Sense Of Humour Failure
TSJD            Texas Size Jelly Donut - official food of Texas sysops
TSR             Terminate and Stay Resident program; Totally Stupid Rules
TT		Two Towers, The (a Tolkien work)
TTBE            That's To Be Expected
TTBOMK          To The Best Of My Knowledge
TTFN            Ta-Ta For Now
TTL4N           That's The Lot For Now
TTM             To The Moderator
TTMNR		Take The Money aNd Run
TTS		Tiny Tit Syndrome
TTUL            Talk (or Type) To you Later
TTYL            Talk To You Later
TTYS		Talk To You Soon
TTYRS           Talk To You Real Soon?
TUFD            The User File Died
TWAIN		Technology Without An Interesting Name
TWIMC		To Whom It May Concern
TWYAS		That's What You All Say	
TWYT		That's What You Think
TYLE		Took You Long Enough
TYVL, YWEL	Thank You Very Little, You're Welcome Even Less
TYVM            Thank You Very Much

U
U/L             Upload, send to the BBS
UAE             Unrecoverable Application Error (Bane of Windows' users!)
UBD		User Brain Damage
UDS		Ugly Domestic Scene
UL              Upload, send to the BBS
UOK		yoU OK?
UNA		Use No Acronyms
UNCLE           Unified Nuclear Coalition of Latvian Emigrants
URLCM		yoU aRe weLCoMe
USU             USUally (frequently just "usu.")
UTC             Under The Counter; Coordinated Universal Time;
			Temps Universel Coordonnie
UTT             Under The Table

V
VBEG		Very Big Evil Grin (as in <vbeg>)
VBG		Very Big Grin (as in <vbg>)
VBSEG		Very Big S--- Eating Grin (as in <vbseg>)
VETLA           Very Enhanced TLA
VH		Virtual Hug
VPL		Visible Panty Line
VR		Virtual Reality
VT		Virtual Time

W
W/              With (frequently just "w/")
W/O             WithOut (frequently just "w/o")
W8		Wait
W8ING		WaitING
WAB?            What, Another Bill?
WADR		With All Due Respect
WAEF            When All Else Fails
WAFWOT		What A F---ing Waste Of Time
WAG             Wild-Assed Guess
WALOC           What A Load of Crap
WAMKSAM         Why Are My Kids (or Kitties) Staring At Me?
WB		Welcome Back
WCAGA           What Comes Around, Goes Around
WCTYBTWHTKY	We Could Tell You, But Then We'd Have To Kill You
WDF		What Da F---?
WDYMBT          What Do (or Did) You Mean By That?
WEFT		Wrong Every F---ing Time
WEHT		WhatEver Happened To (usu. followed by someone's name)
WFHIT 		What Fresh Hell Is This? (from the writings of Dorothy Parker)
WFM             Works For Me
WFO		Wide Full (or F---ing) Open
WGAS		Who Gives A S---
WIBAMU          Well I'll Be A Monkey's Uncle
WIBNIF		Wouldn't If Be Nice IF...
WIGAC		When I Get A Chance
WIMP            Windows, Icons, Mouse, Pointing
WIZOP           Wizard Sysop (the primary forum administrator for a forum)
WMMOWS          Wash My Mouth Out With Soap
WOA             Work Of Art
WOFTAM          Waste Of Flaming Time And Money
WOLF		Witless One Line Followup
WOM		Word Of Mouth
WOMBAT		Waste Of Money, Brains, And Time
WOWF		Witless One Word Followup
WRATGAS		Who Really And Truly Gives A S---
WRT             With Regard To; With Respect To
WSD		Willing Suspension of Disbelief (e.g. when watching movies)
WTF             What The F---
WTFDIC		What The F--- Do I Care
WTFDIK          What The F--- Do I Know
WTFDYTYA        Who The F--- Do You Think You Are
WTFIIWT_A	What The F--- Is It With These _____ Anyway?
WTFO            What The F---, Over (Reply)
WTFWT           "What the F--- Was That?"  - Mayor of Hiroshima
WTG             Way To Go
WTH             What The Hell (or Heck)
WTMKF		Welcome To My Kill Filter
WUGAC		When yoU Get A Chance
WWS             Wife Wants Sex (please wait a tic)
WWW             World Wide Web; World Wide Waste; World Wide Waiting;
			World Wild Web
WYBMADIITY	Will You Buy Me A Double If I Tell You?
WYLABOCTGWTR    Would You Like A Bowl Of Cream To Go With That Remark?
WYLASOMWTC      Would You Like A Saucer Of Milk With That Comment?
WYGAC		When You Get A Chance
WYGIWYG         What You Got Is What You Get
WYGIWYPF        What You Get Is What You Pay For
WYP		What's Your Point?
WYSBANRTWYG	What You See Bears Absolutely No Relation To What You Get
WYSINEWYGBIC	What You See Is Not Exactly What You Get But It's Close
WYSBYGI         What You See Before You Get It
WYSIWYG         What You See Is What You Get
WYSOH		Where's Your Sense Of Humor?
WYTYSYDG        What You Thought You Saw, You Didn't Get

X
XYZ		eXamine Your Zipper

Y
Y2K		Year 2000 (2000 = 2K)
Y3		Yadda Yadda Yadda
Y6B		whY 6 Billion? (ie, overpopulation is more dangerous than Y2K)
YABA            Yet Another Bloody Acronym
YAC		are You Available to Chat?
YADS            Yet Another DOS Shell
YAFA            Yet Another "Fine" Acronym
YAFIYGI		You Asked For It, You Got It
YANETUT		You Are Not Expected To Understand This
YAOTM           Yet Another Off-Topic Message
YAP             Yet Another Ploy
YBYSA		You Bet Your Sweet Ass
YCDBSOYA        You Can't Do Business Sitting On Your Ass!
YCDBWYCID	You Can't Do Business When Your Computer Is Down!
YCLIU		You Can Look It Up
YGTBK           You've Got To Be Kidding
YGTBDSM		You've Got To Be Dry-Shaving Me
YGTBSM          You've Got To Be S----ing Me!
YHB_		You Have Been ______
YHBW		You Have Been Warned
YHGASPL         You Have Got A Serious Problem, Lad!
YHGMTPO_	You Have Greatly Misunderstood The Purpose Of ______
YHL		You Have Lost
YHTBT		You Had To Be There
YKIYEI		You Killed It, You Eat It
YKWIM		You Know What I Mean
YKYB            You Know You've Been 
YKYB_TLW	You Know You've Been ______ing Too Long When . . .
YM		You Mean
YMMV            Your Mileage May Vary; literally, "your experience may differ".
YOYO		You're On Your Own
YR		Yeah Right
YSS             You Suck Severely
YWHOL		Yelling "WooHoo" Out Loud (as in LOL)
YWSYLS          You Win Some, You Lose Some

Z
ZNT             ZiffNeT

Credits:
Some of the original compilers, collectors, contributors, etc. of abbreviations and acronyms include: Johnny Orgovan, William Post, Bernard Roizen, BGraves, Manik Roy, Brad McCormick, Barry McKenna, and the many, many others who have undoubtedly contributed to the lists of abbreviations and acronyms that have gone into this compilation. Many thanks to all of you without whom this file wouldn't exist. I am trying to keep this list to the more commonly used and/or interesting abbrevs/acros out there, so I may not included everything I've been sent. Sorry, about that, but there are *tons* of abbrev/acros out there so I'm trying to limit my list a little bit. I've forgotten to keep track of the contributors to this list for a while, so if you've sent something to me that was included and your name isn't here in the credits, please remind me of your contribution and I'll add your name to the list.

Disclaimer: Please note that I am only the compiler of this list, NOT the creator. I merely compiled the available abbreviations and acronyms that people have sent to me. I am not responsible for their accuracy or appropriateness. If you find any of the material contained here offensive or inappropriate, do not blame me -- I did not make up any of them, I just compiled them together from various sources. This list is meant to be a source for looking up abbreviations and acronyms that are used on the Internet and therefore it is not up to me to censor them; I include what people tell me is used. If you don't like the abbreviations and acronyms in here, simply do not use them.