Visit to my mother - 84 years old, Mima's father 74 years old
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Since six days on the road without a word written! Life moves to fast, to waste one moment with words. Words like dry winter leaves blown away, words like trace in the sand, washed away from the waves. This sacred space of night meditations: sharing my mind with my beloveds, with curious people, sharing this life of luxury in my costly travelling home, Nobydick: the VW-Transporter with everything a home needs: a gas heater, a gas-oven to cook, a fridge and several plastic bottles with clean Munich waters for coffee and to brush our teeth. |
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| My woman Mimamai has finished her Christmas Market in
Bamberg on Thursday, the 23rd December. Her Market hut lies in wooden parts
in her trailer. The trailer stands in her garage. My muscles hurt all Friday
long: my body is not used, to carry the wooden walls of her hut in the
trailer. Christmas time the money making machine in our country runs berserk. People move around like crazy, to make or to spend money. Stress symptoms grow, in my life too. |
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| Mima stores all her merchant items, candles, little light
houses, toys - made from sheet metal in China - Mima packs everything with
care in her two garages in the wonderful old town Bamberg. Tired from tension we relax two Christmas days in her holiday apartment, before we leave for our little journey to my old mother cross the country on Monday. |
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| The highways are not over crowded, we pass from South to North in free drive. In Bad Kissingen we rest in a warm winter night in the motor home. In the morning I change the gas bottles in the snow fall outside. Snow all day long. We are lucky, to get a new gas bottle in the little town Bad Kissingen near the luxurious bath. The long sauna sessions wash away all tensions, to sleep satisfied for seven, eight hours. |
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| We arrive in a snow white winter land in Bad Laer, 400 Kilometres away from Bamberg. My mother grows in her older and older age from visit to visit. Mima's old mother died one year ago. My mother lives in a world of her own. We never know, which parts of our stories reach to her, from our little holiday voyages in spring and in autumn. Mima shows her beautiful pictures from our Norway trip. Marvellous world in mysterious beauty. |
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| The way my Mimamai talks with the both old sisters, my mother and my aunt, reminds me, how close we live together, my woman with me. She is a daughter to my mother now. The women share from her hearts closer and more intense, than I can do. I listen with admiration to their cosy conversation - without jealousy, without guilt or shame: this women's world is a planet of miracles. Out of reach for my stupid senses. |
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| The car inside is heated up to nearly 18 degrees Celsius. This creates a cosy tiny room, to share these thoughts in silence with my electronically memory, the PsiON palmtop. Mimamai breathes in calming rhythm in her bed under the roof. Sleep comes early at 10.00 p.m. The salty waters of the bath, where the car parks, opens at 7.00 a.m. I expect, the five kilograms bottle gas should heat up the room for two, three nights at minimum. The battery is loaded again from the five, six hours drive today. 15 degrees Celsius are enough for a comfortable night in our sleeping bags. |
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| After the visit to my mother Mima drives to several old friends, she knows since more than 20 years. Two old sannyasins spend a quite happy comfortable country life with successful big candle markets: Some sort of Christmas candle company. Both are interested, to join our group gathering.
Swami Anand
Visarjana is a painter like da Gaff from Texas. My best intentions for the year 2005: the start of a more modest, less provocative sharing. Friends ready to meet in life are and will be the focus of our sharing - at least of mine. |
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Mima, Mother and aunt
Who cares, what and how mind moves this moment or the next?
What counts, are real meetings, life gatherings - no matter,
in what believes or EGO manifestations an actual individual state
demonstrates right now.
| Death takes it all, death took life from more than 100.000 people in the submarine earthquake in East-Asia. Maybe one pro mille of the dead people are from Germany. Death takes it all: life-, Ego- and all-reduction in a terrific Tsunami-wave. Out of the blue. Night fantasies freeze the body. Mind mirrors this world catastrophic in a well heated motor home on a camping place in Bad Rothenfelde, next to Bad Laer, 10 Kilometres close by. |
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| The electric current from outside charges the battery, gives power for all lights and the fridge, most important to the ventilator of the gas oven. Several degrees below zero. Heated air from the gas oven keeps us warm in the car in one winter night more on this trip. Mimamai complains, because she lost two games in Back Gammon. We drink red wine. I watch her mind, calculating clever, how to make her play. But in the end she remains second winner and shows emotions like a child girl. Nice. I love her simple ways to express herself. |
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| She shelters with her heart my mind moving in mystical sky lines of fancy fantasies. That's our way, we
fulfill each other need as a couple. This is my experience, to enjoy a richer life together with a woman. Good night. Thanks for being with us in our virtual playground with real people alive! Four hour drive move us nearly four hundred Kilometres smooth south back to Bavaria, Bad Kissingen. We stay at the same parking place, we stood three nights ago. ''Kisssalis'' is the name of the luxurious Thermal bath with beautiful sauna bathes. One has a fire inside. |
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| Three days ago the tsunami killed around 50.000 people. Today the news report about 100.000 death victims in this Christmas tsunami. German chancellor Schroeder asks the people, to donate the money of New Year fireworks to the victimized people and families in Asia. The daily boulevard BILD titles: ''Does the earth crash?'' New Year: Back to Bamberg |
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| Mima and I sleep the sixth night in the motor home. We celebrate into the New Year 2005 near Bamberg with a bottle Prosecco. Still 250 Kilometres away from home we walk through the dark city. Darkness falls at 5.00 p.m. Students and other young people look for partners. Mima's older sister too. Mima and I, we both enjoy our rare free hours together and will fall in deep sleep, when the midnight fireworks illuminates the dark sky. |
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In our holiday week we walk six days in rain, one day the sky turns into blue colour and the sun colours the winter country in mystical beauty. Mima's father donates 1000 Euro as help for the victims of the tsunami catastrophe. All animals in a wild life reservation in Sri Lanka survived the catastrophe. 120.000 humans lost their life. Each time, when I read this report again, I have to correct this head counting number of suffering. |
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Have we two-legs-walking-mammals lost our connection to live? Are humans not in tune anymore with nature to listen to their signals? When have we two-legs-walking-mammals lost the ability to listen to mother nature? Have we lost the ability to listen to our natural voice inside too? Do we all together slip into a degenerated UN-natural, cyber-scientific belief, into a virtual reality like in a Computer-killer-movie? |
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| Do we screw us as collective unconscious degenerated unnatural two-leg-walker-mammals as killer-robots into a dead road to doom forever? Do these catastrophes, this earth-quake with the tsunami wave sign a scripture on the screen? An advertising for the final fight fly? Run humans into the abyss? Are we on a voyage with no-return? Does the Shiva destruction nowadays comes from Mother Nature directly without interference of our two-legs-walking-mammals killing efforts? |
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| The firework at midnight I watch from a hill nearby Bamberg. Soon midnight sleep is stronger than the explosions of the lights and stars, sparkling signs in the sky. |
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In the car Mother nature has always the greater impact and impressions in my nights: even light rain on the roof is more intense than the firework explosions. Mimamai does not even wake up. What's about a thunder storm over the thin plastic roof? Nature is the teacher, the master, the ultimate reward and punishment. Humans organize life till now on an individual and collective scale to an incredible overflow of energy: some share experiences with less and less expectations. This is the joy to share from our overflowing energy.
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